{"id":812,"date":"2025-04-28T13:16:42","date_gmt":"2025-04-28T13:16:42","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/homestac.com\/?p=812"},"modified":"2025-04-29T14:50:50","modified_gmt":"2025-04-29T14:50:50","slug":"when-did-engagement-nails-become-just-as-important-as-the-ring","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/homestac.com\/index.php\/2025\/04\/28\/when-did-engagement-nails-become-just-as-important-as-the-ring\/","title":{"rendered":"When Did Engagement Nails Become Just As Important As The Ring?"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n
<\/figure>\n<\/div>\n

If you count a clandestine religious ceremony done on a whim in the middle of lockdown, then I\u2019ve been married<\/a> for five years. Such was our story (which featured a Romeo and Juliet-adjacent plot of angry families, forbidden love, and different religions<\/a>) that we never had time for traditions. We didn\u2019t give each other rings, and there was certainly no proposal. But I\u2019m just a girl<\/a>, and I want one, which means my kind-of-husband, Jack, is under strict instructions to propose properly one day, which we will then follow with a more public legal ceremony. I also want him to get me the perfect ring (a salt and pepper diamond, set in gold and preferably made by We Are Arrow<\/a> on London\u2019s eclectic Columbia Road), and he needs to make sure I\u2019ve had a manicure<\/a> beforehand. I don\u2019t care how he does it, but I won\u2019t be happy if he proposes to me and my nails aren\u2019t freshly done. I wouldn\u2019t say no \u2014 I do love him, after all \u2014\u00a0but I\u2019ll be damned if a crusty cuticle dares feature in my engagement announcement<\/a> photos.<\/p>\n

Why do we care so much about engagement nails?<\/h2>\n

I see both the ring and the nails as a duo. When it comes to the actual engagement day, in my opinion, you can\u2019t have one without the other. I know it sounds a little shallow, but as it happens, I\u2019m not alone in my thoughts. In today\u2019s social media-driven world, engagement nails are just as significant as the ring \u2014\u00a0and for some, even the proposal itself. Search \u201cengagement nails<\/a>\u201d on TikTok and you\u2019ll find over 60 posts \u2014 ranging from inspo videos to clips of people attempting to trick their soon-to-be-engaged friends<\/a> into getting a manicure \u2014 with millions of combined views. Here, engagement nails are immortalized, paraded online for all to see. With this in mind, they need to be perfect: fresh, understated, timeless \u2014 and immune to fleeting trend cycles.\u00a0<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve slowly been drip-feeding the idea of a surprise, pre-engagement manicure to Jack for years. \u201cBut it\u2019ll ruin the moment!\u201d he insists. \u201cYou\u2019ll know what\u2019s happening!\u201d He\u2019s not wrong \u2014 I might. But I\u2019m so sure of my plan and plight that I\u2019m willing to run the risk. I\u2019ve drawn up an entire scheme for him to follow, which involves contacting my favorite nail artist and paying her in advance, then asking her to invite me to a \u201ccomplimentary appointment\u201d. This magical appointment will then only feature specific, engagement-worthy shades. I suppose prescribing a process does somewhat take the romance out of the situation. But\u00a0what can I say?\u00a0It\u2019s important to me, and I\u2019m not leaving anything up to chance.\u00a0<\/p>\n

For some, this chance is exactly what made their own engagement manicure stories so special. It wasn\u2019t about the nails, per se, but the thought that went into them: \u201cChris did a very good job of tricking me into getting a manicure,\u201d says Ellen Scott<\/a>, a journalist and digital editor at Stylist<\/em>. \u201cHe was very sneaky and wise. He contacted Shoreditch Nails<\/a> and asked them to pretend to invite me for a press appointment. I didn\u2019t question it at all.\u201d They even painted a heart on Ellen\u2019s ring finger, she tells me, which still didn\u2019t tip her off. \u201cI was completely taken aback when he proposed and was genuinely so touched that he had thought to make sure my nails looked good.\u201d If it wasn\u2019t for Chris\u2019s caring ingenuity, Ellen tells me she \u201cprobably wouldn\u2019t have posted a pic\u201d of the engagement ring right away.<\/p>\n

Similarly, an informal Instagram poll among my friends and followers revealed that many wouldn\u2019t post an in-the-moment picture of their engagement ring unless their nails were freshly done. For Hollie Kelly<\/a>, head of PR at Kit Studios<\/a>, receiving a proposal without a manicure would make her \u201chold off on telling anyone\u201d about the engagement. Or, she says, she\u2019d hide her nails in pictures.\u00a0Hannah*, a marketing manager, says she would \u201chave to have them done in a long, almond shape to lengthen the overall appearance of the fingers and nail bed.\u201d Without this, she admits, she\u2019d redo her nails before posting. \u201cIn an extreme situation, I\u2019d [use] Photoshop,\u201d she says.\u00a0<\/p>\n

I don\u2019t Photoshop pictures often, but when I do, it\u2019s almost always because I feel like I need to conform to a certain beauty standard. Having perfect nails is yet another ideal \u2014\u00a0or rather, expectation \u2014\u00a0imposed on women in recent years. It\u2019s also worth considering the effects of \u201cnail privilege<\/a>\u201d when it comes to posting your hands online. An extension of \u201cpretty privilege\u201d,\u00a0which affords those who are conventionally pretty better social and economic advantages, nail privilege sees people judged and treated differently according to their nail choices.<\/p>\n

Because of this, Ri* says she \u201calways thinks about\u201d her future engagement nails: \u201cI feel like I should start getting my nails done regularly now, ready for when Josh pops the question. It\u2019s genuinely been a thought in my mind.\u201d Meanwhile, Savannah* says she feels \u201cvery self-conscious\u201d about her hands and future engagement posts on social media. \u201cMy ADHD makes me always pick at my nails, so I\u2019ve never had them done. Yet, even though I\u2019m not a nail person, I still worry my hands won\u2019t be up to the beauty standard, which is mad to think about.\u201d<\/p>\n

During my research, I heard from lots of other women who\u2019d be \u201cannoyed,\u201d \u201cfuming,\u201d or \u201cnot pleased\u201d if they encountered a proposal sans manicure, but one woman, Harriet*, confesses she\u2019d find it \u201ctraumatic\u201d. For her, it isn\u2019t about the images on social media or even adhering to a standard. It\u2019s about looking put-together as a whole. Harriet admits to always having freshly painted nails, but even so, she\u2019s told her partner \u201cnot to propose\u201d if her nails look unkempt. According to her, \u201cit\u2019s better to have no nail polish at all,\u201d than to have chipped nails.<\/p>\n

Are engagement nails more important than the ring?<\/h2>\n

It might sound extreme to ask someone not to propose without a pre-proposal manicure, but it\u2019s not unheard of. Rebecca Crawforth, nail expert and founder of Navy Professional Tools<\/a>, confirms that \u201cengagement nails have become just as essential as the ring itself.\u201d For me, it\u2019s less binary than that; my nails are a part of my identity. I haven\u2019t sported bare nails in years, and people have told me that they think of fun nails whenever my name is brought up in conversation. Personally, if Jack made sure I had nice nails in advance of proposing, it would show me that he really knows me. Still, I wonder whether placing that kind of expectation on a partner borders on unnecessary pressure, even if it comes from a place of wanting to feel understood. I certainly wouldn\u2019t say no to a heartfelt proposal due to the state of my fingertips.<\/p>\n

On the contrary, for Ella*, an influencer with over 22K followers on Instagram, it would be an instant \u201cno\u201d to any proposal if her nails weren\u2019t done beforehand \u2014\u00a0no matter the ring or the person. \u201cIf he proposes to me without my nails being done, then he isn\u2019t the one for me. Sorry, not sorry! Like, I\u2019m a nail girl \u2014\u00a0know your audience, boo! Buh-bye!\u201d It\u2019s not even about the pictures, she says, but about feeling her best in the moment: \u201cMy nails are such a big part of my identity,\u201d she adds.\u00a0\u201cI\u2019ve had acrylics for over 10 years!\u201d<\/p>\n

Does planning your engagement nails ruin the moment?<\/h2>\n

It turns out not everyone buys into the idea of engagement nails. Adele*, an NHS worker in her 20s, says we are \u201can ungrateful generation\u201d and \u201cengagement nails are stupid as a concept\u201d. She was the only one who shared a different perspective \u2014 everyone else agreed that perfect engagement nails were a must. \u201cI do understand people wanting to look nice and not posting chewed nails, but half the [people] on TikTok know they\u2019re getting engaged because of them,\u201d she says.<\/p>\n

But just as Scott remained oblivious in her story above, this doesn\u2019t mean your engagement nails have to spoil the surprise of the actual engagement.<\/p>\n

What are the biggest engagement nail trends?<\/h2>\n

Scroll through TikTok or Instagram, and it\u2019s hard to miss how similar all the engagement nails look: unbearably clean and perfect. There are no cuticles, little to no colour, and only the smallest spatterings of nail art, like \u201cdelicate lines or micro pearls,\u201d according to Crawforth. \u201cWe\u2019re seeing a real return to understated elegance, and the \u2018clean girl\u2019 aesthetic is still going strong,\u201d she explains. \u201cThink sheer pinks, milky whites and classic nude tones that enhance the natural nail.\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n

As a diehard nail art fan who can only bear a plain set for approximately two days before getting bored, this feels like another subtle beauty expectation<\/a>. It gives off a bit of a \u201ctrad wife<\/a>\u201d vibe \u2014 as if we\u2019re meant to look effortlessly polished, but not like we\u2019ve put in any effort. <\/p>\n

Traditionally, writes Refinery29\u2019s beauty director Jacqueline Kilikita<\/a>, in the late 19th century, painted nails were a feminist and risqu\u00e9 style statement, with later cultural icons like Frida Kahlo and Josephine Baker adopting bold nails. Returning to understated, barely-there designs can feel like a step away from that spirit, though I do understand coveting a design that won\u2019t go out of style. Rachael Gibson<\/a>, known online as The Hair Historian<\/a>, previously told me<\/a> that people are caught up in the idea that \u201cnatural beauty is best\u201d because it suggests a \u201cpure\u201d and \u201csuperior\u201d idea of femininity \u2014 it\u2019s untouched and as nature made you, as if you haven\u2019t fallen prey to vanity.<\/p>\n

\n
<\/figure>\n<\/div>\n

Saying this, there\u2019s no denying the allure of a clean, perfect-looking set of nails,\u00a0as long as you\u2019re choosing them because you love them, and not because you feel like you have to. While they remain the status quo among engagement posts online, some are remaining resolute in their nail preferences. Scott opted for nail art on her engagement nails<\/a>, with mismatched pink drawings on each finger. Perhaps the tides are turning.\u00a0I\u2019ve spotted a tentative wave of more experimental engagement nails recently. Think bold chrome finishes<\/a>, darker shades, or nail art<\/a> that reflects the wearer\u2019s personality. Just as the engagement ring market is evolving to include less traditional-looking designs, mixed metals, lab-grown diamonds, and the like, I think we\u2019re about to see a shift in engagement nail designs, too.<\/p>\n

As much as I sit here and criticize the clean nail aesthetic, when it comes to my future engagement nails, I\u2019ll probably opt for a similar look via The Gel Bottle\u2019s new, fairy-like, sheer BIAB gels<\/a>. Will it be because I truly love them, or because I\u2019m just human and influenced by beauty trends? This is TBD.\u00a0But one thing\u2019s for sure: a good engagement manicure, whatever the shade or shape, is the ultimate flex.<\/p>\n

*Name has been changed.<\/em><\/p>\n

This story was originally published on Refinery29 UK.<\/em><\/p>\n

Like what you see? How about some more R29 goodness, right here?<\/strong><\/p>\n

11 Butter Yellow Nail Ideas \u2014 & How To DIY Them<\/a><\/p>\n

Collagen Manicures Promise Healthy Natural Nails<\/a><\/p>\n

Is It Ever Okay To Refuse To Pay For A Manicure?<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

If you count a clandestine religious ceremony done on a whim in the middle of lockdown, then I\u2019ve been married for five years. Such was our story (which featured a Romeo and Juliet-adjacent plot of angry families, forbidden love, and different religions) that we never had time for traditions. We didn\u2019t give each other rings,…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":814,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[14],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/homestac.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/812"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/homestac.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/homestac.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/homestac.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/homestac.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=812"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/homestac.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/812\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":817,"href":"https:\/\/homestac.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/812\/revisions\/817"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/homestac.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/814"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/homestac.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=812"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/homestac.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=812"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/homestac.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=812"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}